Things I will not miss

One reason I am pretty much looking forward to retirement is that the incidence of this sort of email exchange with my students seems to be becoming more, rather than less, common:

On Apr 25, 2012 at 10:32 PM, XXXXXXXXX wrote:

Professor,

I was just wondering when the soonest day is I could make up Test 3, which I missed yesterday.  I work for [an auto dealership] and I was on a dealership trade to [an out-of area location].  My bosses will verify if you would like to call them or if you would like a note instead.  Please message me back soon and inform me with the day you are available to administer the retake.

On Apr 25, 2012 at 10:37 PM, I responded:

You did not miss Test 3; it is scheduled for--and has always been scheduled for--next Tuesday (take a look at the most recent announcement on [the course management system] which was there already when you sent your message).  I expect to see you on Tuesday, May 1.

The student, by the way, has not been in class for the past five weeks.